Heavy Heart
by Kinpaginpa
Summary: Hiccup wanted nothing more than to jump on Toothless's back and escape Berk. But there were two big things stopping him. One was his new responsibility. The other problem weighed even more heavily... Hiccup and Toothless post HTTYD 2.


Hello again!

I'm not 100% sure this one is finished, but it's been on my computer since this summer, so I thought I'd put it up and see what you all think. Enjoy!

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><p>The Bewilderbeast attack hit the village of Berk hard. The damage was extensive, with some roofs blown clean off and other houses completely buried in ice. Repairs had been running day and night for the past few days as the villagers worked tirelessly to restore enough buildings to shelter everyone from the cold, dreary weather of Berk.<p>

For the first time since the attack, repairs had been halted for the night and the village lay dark and quiet. The only fire still lit shone through the cracks of the door to the Great Hall, where a late night meeting was still in session. Berk's young chief, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, sat at the head of one of the long tables, listening to a repair team leader finish up a status report.

"...and we finished up those repairs on the southern roofs. All done there!" The large man beamed up at his chief.

"So the Horricks and the Jorgensons are sleeping in their own homes tonight?"

"Yes sir! And they are very thankful, sir."

"Thanks Gruff," Hiccup smiled gratefully down the table. "Now..." He reached down next to him to pick up a stack of papers with build repairs sketched on them.

"Hiccup."

The new chief looked over in surprise at the man sitting to his right. Gobber was giving him a look. The older man reached his hook over and gently pushed the papers back towards the table.

"It's late, son. It's time to call it a day."

Hiccup looked up in surprise at the rest of the table. Two people had fallen asleep with their faces in their hands, and Bucket was snoring softly.

"Right..." Hiccup said slowly, dropping the papers. "Sorry, it's just... there's so much to do."

"Aye," Gobber agreed, "But, if you'll agree with me Chief, let's call it a night."

Hiccup swallowed. "Of- of course."

A general sense of relief swept through the room. The leaders all stood up, ready to head home. They were all pulling long days, trying their best to rebuild their destroyed village. The most important job had been making sure everyone had a place to spend the night. That had been their only priority the first few days. Now they were roofing and rebuilding walkways and trying to put the place back together. The leaders had voted to build a statue in Stoick's honor.

Hiccup sat and watched as the leaders filed out. He was feeling overwhelmed by it all. At a time like this, the people of Berk needed Stoick. He grimaced as he felt the swooping, hot sensation in his gut that came with the thought of his father. He had held it together and tried his best to uphold his new position in his father's honor, but it wasn't easy. This kind of thing didn't come naturally to him. How hard would it have been to look up and notice that men were falling asleep?

A few of the men stopped by to assure him that he was doing a great job. It didn't make him feel much better.

Gobber stood up next to him and placed his good hand on his shoulder.

"Your father would be proud," He said, before turning away and following the rest of the men out of the Great Hall.

Hiccup wished he wouldn't say things like that. He couldn't stop the burning sensation behind his eyes when he heard those words. Half sorrow and half shame, he was only reminded of how great a man his father was and how he could never dream of filling those shoes. The only person who could have taught him was gone... If only he'd listened for _one second_ before...

Hiccup blinked furiously. More than anything, he wanted to prove to the people of Berk that he was strong enough to be their leader. And crying wouldn't help that at all.

He sat, staring across the hall, as Gobber's uneven footsteps finally faded. As soon as silence reached him, he sighed loudly and let his head fall on the table.

What he wouldn't give to escape on Toothless, ride again in the sky...

Hiccup quickly drove this thought from his mind and stood up, roughly shoving his chair out from behind him. He made his way out of the hall and walked out into the night. It was quiet in the village. Hiccup put his hands in his fur pockets (he hadn't had the need to wear his flying gear in quite some time) and began a roundabout route home.

He knew that his mother wouldn't be in the house. The first night they'd been home, there'd been an awkward moment where neither of them had been sure where she would sleep. Hiccup was torn about offering her his father's room. Sure, that's where she had slept oh so long ago, but now...

He could tell that they both felt a little weird about it because before he could say anything, she'd smiled apologetically and explained that she would feel more comfortable, at least for now, sleeping outside, with Cloudjumper. That, after all, was how she'd been sleeping for years. While this made sense, it had filled Hiccup with a different kind of sadness, and he hoped she would move in more permanently soon.

But for now, it was just him. And Toothless.

Toothless.

His best friend.

His fists clenched in frustration as he walked slowly along the path. After the tumultuous last few days, Hiccup wanted nothing more than to jump on Toothless's back and escape Berk. But there were two big things stopping him.

One was his new responsibility. As he and Astrid had discussed, being Chief meant a lot less free time. And that was true even when the whole village didn't need to be rebuilt. These last few days, he was lucky to see Toothless at all, never mind ride him. True to her word, Astrid had taken been taking his dragon out, to give him exercise and make sure he didn't get into too much hyperactivity-induced trouble. But he knew that Toothless wasn't a huge fan of flying with anyone other than himself. Astrid was definitely second best, but he knew his friend resented their lack of flying time as much as he did.

The other problem was harder. Hiccup was upset with himself for allowing these thoughts to build up, but he couldn't help it.

Toothless had killed his father.

And he knew, he _knew_, that it wasn't his fault. That the Toothless he knew and loved would never do anything like that. He knew that, backwards and forwards.

But he couldn't stop the thoughts that drifted through his head.

Meeting Toothless had been the single best thing that had ever happened to him. His new friend had changed his life and the lives of everyone on Berk. He had changed the way Hiccup saw himself. Even after losing a leg, he had felt more whole with Toothless around than he ever had before.

But if he hadn't met Toothless, wouldn't his father still be alive?

Again, Hiccup clenched his fists and berated himself. If he hadn't met Toothless, their whole village could be dead, killed off by the dragons they never would have stopped fighting. Things had been hopeless back then... of _course_ it was good that all of that had changed.

But as always, Hiccup's thoughts swung back, like a relentless pendulum. He couldn't stop dark thoughts from dancing across his mind.

Hiccup reached his front door and hesitated guiltily. He didn't want to walk in and be greeted joyously by his friend. His loyal friend. But it was getting very late and he was exhausted, so he pushed open the door.

The entrance was dark and empty. He let out his breath. Even though it was what he craved more than anything right now, he felt relieved that he might not have to face his dragon if he was already asleep upstairs. He headed upstairs, his eyes beginning to droop heavily and his feet dragging against the steps.

The loft was empty.

He blinked a few times and looked around again, then turned around and went back downstairs to see if he'd missed Toothless curled up in a corner somewhere. His dragon was nowhere to be seen.

Panic gripped him. He suddenly knew: Toothless had run away. Toothless knew the dark thoughts that had been possessing Hiccup. After all, they were very in tune with each other. And he'd gotten angry, or felt so guilty that he couldn't stay here. And he'd left. He'd left and he'd never see him again.

His ears started ringing and he reached out to grip the chair next to him. He was about to run outside, yelling for Toothless (He'd hear him. Of course he would... no matter how far away he was...) when he suddenly heard a noise coming from his father's bedroom.

Startled, he turned towards the door. The house was quiet again.

His breathing began to slow as he walked towards the door. Toothless wouldn't be... he never had before...

He pushed the door open.

A large dark mass was curled up on his father's bed. Relief surged through him as he stepped closer. He stood for a few seconds before he realized that the dragon wasn't sleeping; there were no tell-tale snores.

"Toothless?"

A head rose up from the bed. Green eyes stared back at him.

"What are you doing in here, bud?"

The dragon blinked at him and then closed his eyes and gently put his head back down. He let out a sound like a mournful sigh.

Hiccup's heart twisted inside his chest.

He walked over to the bed and placed his hand on Toothless's head. He rubbed his hand slowly over the rough skin beneath his fingers, and Toothless pushed his nose down into the blankets that covered the bed, cooing sadly.

His voice was choked, but he managed a whisper. "You miss him too?"

Toothless responded by nudging his head against Hiccup's hand. Berk's newest chief dropped slowly to his knees by the edge of the bed as emotion overwhelmed him. Toothless pushed his head forward until their foreheads touched.

For the first time in days, Hiccup screwed up his eyes and let himself cry.

His fingers grasped the furs at the edge of the bed as his shoulders shook. When he began to sob, Toothless matched him with mournful moans.

Thoughts of the father he would never see again paralyzed him. And the weight of his new responsibilities felt like they could crush him at any second. But the realization that Toothless was mourning with him... it kept him tethered.

Hiccup reached a shaking arm up to wipe his eyes. Toothless finally moved, pulling his head back. Hiccup lifted his head to look at his friend and then lunged towards him, wrapping his arms around his neck.

"I'm so sorry Toothless." The words poured out of him, and it felt like balm on his soul. "I'm so sorry. I love you, bud. I love you."

He realized then and there that he held no resentment towards Toothless. All of the hesitation that had consumed him before fell away, and he swore he felt a physical burden lift off him.

He climbed into his father's bed and lay against his best friend.

Toothless licked him, just once, and he laughed, softly. Hiccup's eyes began to droop heavily again as he reprimanded him jokingly.

"You KNOW that doesn't come out."

Toothless cooed in response and then laid his head on Hiccup's lap. The young man curled up against his dragon's warmth and relaxed, finally allowing sleep to pull him in.

Boy and dragon slept side by side.

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><p>I paid to see this movie four times this summer X) I was in love! Now I've got it on DVD and the bug is back!<p>

Hope you all enjoyed! Please let me know what you thought in a review. It'd make my day!


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